Its Been a while since Raya, baru nak online. Inipun kene pegi cc nak sampaikan big news kat Ruqaya... So, what have been happening was... manyak sangat loo..

First of all, aku sangat berbahagia raya kali ini akhirnya kembali bersama keluarge. so aku memilih baju bertema putih bermakna i'm back to innocent dan sedikit hitam disitu means i'm still me.. Raye paling best skali bile beraye kat kampung separap. Kampung lamaku.. Banyak kenangan manis tetibe terimbau kembali.. mase kecik2 dulu naik basikal keliling kampung, curik kucing orang, pegi memancing kat tali air... bile teringat balik bestnyeee... andai saja mampu aku kembalikan waktu, tapi nak waktu main-main je.. takmo plak mase pegi sekolah.. sebab aku kadang-kadang kene duduk kat perhimpunan buat kije sekolah.. mase jadi pengawas, aku ambik kesempatan masuk bilik stor konon-konon nak carik hantu... aku ade ahli seekers tersendiri beleive it or not.

Cerita Raya Aidilfitri dah lapok.. Sekanrang Raya Haji pulak.. tibe-tibe teringat saat aku exam paper ke3 kot.. Speaking test for Arabic Language. Aku dapat Anisah yang paaaaaling kedekot markah.. Aku diberi peluang untuk pilih article mane yg aku nak baca.. Aku pilih Makkah al-Mukarramah kerana terselit cerita tentang Nabi Ebraheem dan Haajar bersama anaknya Ismail.. Aku ditanya kenapa suka part ini. Maka aku berkata, kerana ketabahan Haajar di padang pasir bersama Ismail dikala kekeringan tak punya air... Allah itu maha Pengasih dan Penyayang.. Sebagai musafir lalu aku sangat tersentuh dan sedikit sebanyak mengubah diri.

Itu kisah exam, bukan raya haji. seperti biasa, aku tak merasa raya tpi bukan itu element penting pada penghayatan Eid Adha. Di kala raya haji aku disana makan daging kambing free, 3 pahlawan ibuku punyai kisah tersendiri. 2 daripada mereka tak dapat balik kampung sebab kejadian tanah runtuh di Bukit Antarabangsa tahun lalu yang telah meragut banyak nyawa.
Abg1 menyaksikan saat tanah itu runtuh tepat di swimming pool die. Runtuhan berlaku kira-kira jam 4pagi, abg2 bertolak dari rumah abg1 pada jam 3.30 pagi beberapa hari sebelum perkahwinannya.. MaashaAllah... Sedang adik aku tido, Abg1 kejutkan lalu turun ke bawah.. tapi lepas tu dorang naik balik sambung tido sementare penduduk lain sebuk bawa barang berpindah ke kawasan selamat... huh?? tido??!!! Dah bangun tido baru la ikut rombongan penyelamat.. Saat tu la jeritan dari runtuhan tanah didengari mereka tatkala mereka berjalan di atasnya..

First of all, my grammar is bad... please dont mind about it. Its Ramadhan isnt it? People do mistakes. Nobody is perfect,, but every year, we shall learn.
Ramadhan is here, and it bring piece of memories that i had once in Syria. My first ramadhan without family and rice, without any Syawal greeting cards, but i think what i have there was more than enough. In fact, I'm able to eat friuts that doesnt exist back home. lol

This Ramadhan finally my family and I gathered altogether. Deep deep in my heart flashig back all the time that i had, the people that i met and the food was massive.

When i was in Syria, me and my friends sometimes gathered to make our own family which it does felt like a real family. Whenever we were talking, and eating, and laughing, there is a question that always we asked each other. What do you get from Syria? so we changed our experiences and opinion. And each time when it's time for me to give mine, i never know what i get.

Perhaps i was blind because i couldnt feel what i felt and i couldnt realize what i saw, since nothing much that i seek as much as them to find Islam in a muslim country. I came from a muslim family, muslim country, surrounded by islam environment, unlike them, they need to get out from their country seeking for religion. These people had opened my mind about the world outside.

Now I'm here, surrounded by bugs that I havent met for almost a year, remembering of a dusty town over there, not to mention windy. Can u imagine dusty and windy? I even wonder how did camels survive. lol. (Picture of Sahara conquered my brain, and a guy with his camel fasting in a dessert) Here, the aura of Ramadhan and Syawal pretty strong. The only thing that i can remember of Ramadhan in Syria was salah tarawikh and Lailatulqadar.

Everytime i went to Jamie Kabeer, I took Mashaf to read while waiting for Isya', some of the villagers will sit behind me. One day, they asked me to read out loud. I am new, naive and hypershy so i fulfill their request. They were shocked because i read it with proper Tajweed. I finally acknowledge that they dont read with proper tajweed but they remember all of them. The most important thing was, they understand them. MashaAllah.

During maghrib time, I break my fast with rice and (serunding-malaysian food) and chicken almost everyday. Sometimes i bought deasert which they call Halawiyat. And sometimes, i got some food from the villagers.

There was a day, i've been invited to a family house to break our fast together. They served me with "Ruz Mindi". It was bomb!! Then, they gave some money. They've been taught to care about Musaffireen,and wee have no option to push away what they want to give. On my way back home,
I remember the father said, " We make kids a lot to fight Israel".

One of the last 10 nights of ramadhan, all the Imam received a messege from Ahl Falak. Night of Lailatulqadar. Jamie kabeer did Qiamulail during that night. I did not know how they figure it out but during that time, the villagers, men and women 'itikaf at the mosque.

When Syawal came, I did nothing. I couldnt go to the Masjeed because I overslept and there's nothing different except that I can eat during the day. Even the Syrian seems normal. They were still wearing the same kind of dress but different colour (colourful and bright). But i missed the sound of Takbeer. So joy, so happy, unlike in Malaysia, the rythm was so sad, too sad to let Ramadhan go away. In the other hand, the rythm in Syria make me feel so joy but yet so sad and joy and thankful....

If anybody would ask me again. What did you get from Syria?
I get everything even though i didnt seek for it.

Did I know? i've been wondering a lot since that day... So i found....

Llama frequently rolling in the dirt, taking a dust bath to help maitain a healthy, fluffy coat of wool.

So do birds scratch the dirt until it is loose or find a sandy or dusty area. They throw the powdery dirt all over it's body and wings and penetrate all the way to the skin to block any attached parasite's breathing hole.

Some more animals such rabbits and squirrels take dust bath too. They pick either sandy or powdery dry, and lies down, roll about, kicks out it's legs, put itself in circles and finishes it with a leap and a shake. These processes help to remove parasites from the animal.

But, is it the same reason when i saw my nephew threw away his baby powder on the couch and threw his body, hands, legs, and hair all over to that powdery area that he made?

p/s: thanx to TEXAS PARKS AND WILDLIE (Nature's bath time) for the meaningful info.

I AM COMING YA... GET PREPARED!!!!

Sekarang hampir tua umurku.. bulan depan masuk 22 tahun..haha.. teringin jugak nak dpt surat dr kwn2 kat m'sia takpun hadiah sebesar gajah.. Ape salahnye nak berangan.. tak perlu dibayar.

Ramai member2 aku dah balik ke negare masing2.. Sebab dan punce? Ape yang dicari tak ketemu malahan ape yang diharap tak seperti yang diharapkan..

Majoriti yang datang sini dari negara barat mengharapkan sesuatu yang tenang dan sesuatu yang boleh menjadikan diri masing2 sebagai muslim yang lebih kuat..

Pendapat aku, mane-mane kite pergi, bergantung dengan ape yang kite nak tafsirkan. Tapi perlu untuk merantau supaya dibuka minda. bukan untuk menutup minda.. Untuk mencari Allah, dimana-mana boleh terjumpa kerana Allah ada di mana-mana.. Oleh sebab itu, betapa pentingnya untuk punyai ilmu didada..

Kawan aku berkata kepada kawan aku : Jangan sampai kau jadi buta kerana kau terlalu mencari kesempurnaan disekelilingmu sedangkan kau sedang melakukan fitnah.

Maksudnya : sedang kite dok komplen kelemahan orang sekeliling, kite tak sedar diri sendiri pun tak sempurna.. dah tu memburu-burukkan kaum lain.. datang merantau bukan untuk lihat keburukan, tapi untuk cari perbezaan dan keistimewaannya..

hmmmm... nak hadiah

If a lovers of Allah you wish to rise,
Turn to Layla with sincerity in your eyes.

From all who scorn your love turn away,
And travel to Allah's lovers wherever you may.

But if your love is totally sincere,
You will see Allah's lovers by staying here.

And if your heart's vission is sure and fair,
You will see her lights shining everywhere..

Aku kembali buat seketika.. bukan menyepi. tapi internet sini susah sikit.. kadang-kadang buleh..kadang-kadang tak buleh.. kehidupan aku agak tunggang langgang sejak sebulan yang lalu. sejak aku bertemu seorang warga amerika dan tinggal serumah... die seorang gadis yang saaaaaaaaaaaaangat baik hati tapi pengaruh buruk dari die memang kuat.

Aku tido lepas solat subuh... bangun bile zohor hampir habis.. jadual aku entah ke mane.. biasenye hari aku diwaktu pagi amat bermakna.. mulai esok, aku restart balik jadual harian aku.. bangun pagi2.. pegi taman, study atau ape saje yg aku nak wat.. skrg agak mudah bagi aku sbb aku telah membina tembok dan ruang yang besar antare aku dan dia.. dan dia tak lagi ganggu hidup aku.. kadang-kadang je..

Semalam timbul satu masalah.. salah seorang flatmate aku menghadapi masalah yang sama dengan aku.. dirasuk oleh tabiat American girl.. Kawan ni dah penat..So, die suke abiskan masa ngan aku sebab aku selalu study dan buat sesuatu yang berfaedah.. Lalu si dia kecik hati terhadap kawan ni sebab byk abiskan mase ngan aku... bile die ajak kawan ni pegi memane, ditolak tawaran tu.. mane taknye.. sape sanggup singgah cafe setiap malam bershisha, balik tengah malam.. bukan tu aje.. setiap malam kol 12 tgh malam, die ajak kwn lelaki dtg hisap shisha setiap hari.. laki tu kawan aku jugak tapi tengah malam??? setiap hari??? sampai subuh??? sape tahan??? aku pun payah nak tido..

Bile kwn2 perempuan aku nak datang banyak plak komplen.. Paling sakit hati... die mengumumkan kepada geng2 syria kami bahawasanya hanya dia yang bersihkan rumah... Pada hemat aku... die baru 2 kali bersihkan rumah.. sampah die tak pernah buang... kitorang bertiga setiap hari bersihkan rumah.. Dah paham dah.. die suke glamour.. kitorang tak eran..tak bantah tak komen.. truth may reveal..

Lagipun sume member dah paham dah.. Aku pergi latakia. pantai di Syria.. Sebab aku perlukan rehat tenangkan fikiran..